A Lucky Draw Of Happiness !!

Today I was talking to a friend of mine, who was telling about this friend of her's who has a very strong personality. For ease, lets call my friend as S and her friend as R.

So R was saying that when she is with R, she feels so great, R is so enthusiastic and excited about S , she gives so much attention to S that makes S feel so special. But when R is not with S, she will not even call once or she will make some plans of her's without informing S. Or she will cancel her plans with S, without even informing her.

So, I was trying to understand why R behaves this way, as she would be hurting S. But S says , since R makes her enjoy when she is with her, so she does not care about the other times when she ignore her other times.


This made me think, is S right in her thoughts or is she just becoming a victim.

I am not here to analyze S's thoughts, but just trying to understand the cause and effect of this kind or relationship.

What was special about Hitler? He was an excellent orator, had a charismatic personality.

Why are American so good in marketing, because they show such enthusiasm and attention to their customers that it makes their customers feel special.

This is what is the kind of personality R exhibit. She bring out her strong personality with the masses( say S and others)and she gives them so much attention when she is with them, that she leaves a long lasting impression in them, and successfully makes them her loyal friends(fans), who will be there for her at her beck and call , whenever she feels like, but at the same time, she doesn't have any emotional link with her friends(fans), but her friends feel as strong bond between themselves and her, because of the happiness which they feel when they are with her. So, here itself, there is a mismatch in the equation. One side is emotionally and strongly attached to the other person, and this person R has no emotional attachment with them.

Now, the next problem, or should I say, the reason why R exhibits this behavior. Now R makes a plan to go for shopping. Nobody likes to shop alone, so she will ask her friends(fans), to go shopping with her. Since they all feel so happy being with her, so she will most likely get quite a few no of them, to go with her. So, now all she has to do is to choose them best among the lot and go with her. So, she has solved her purpose of getting one company and thus is able to avoid what most of the people feels so sad about, i.e not finding any company to go out sometimes. So, she is all happy. Now, what happens to the other people whom she asked but didn't go with them. They will feel sad and lonely, and will try to kill time or will try to pick some of their other friends and see if anyone is available and as expected would not find many takes for her plan.

So, what I see here is that R is using people for her own satisfaction and people like S and the likes are her pawn which she always can keep in her pocket and use them at her own discretion. She is a practical woman who's only motive is to think about herself and damm the rest of the world, in a very smart manner.

Can you call people like R, your friends, with whom they can share anything anytime freely and expect a whole hearted reply from her. Or should they keep waiting for the days when R will chose them among the lot of her friends and take them out.

Do you want someone to dictate the happiness of your life or do you want to take command of it yourself and invest your emotions and energy into a friend who can reciprocate the same and doesn't make your happiness a chance of lucky draw among other friends of her?

PS: I have no qualms about R as she is just following the Darwin's theory of "survival of the fittest".