Comfortably Numb !!
"There is no pain, you are receding.
A distant ship’s smoke on the horizon.
You are only coming through in waves.
Your lips move but I can’t hear what you’re sayin’.
When I was a child I had a fever.
My hands felt just like two balloons.
Now I got that feeling once again.
I can’t explain, you would not understand.
This is not how I am.
I have become comfortably numb."
I remember this song whenever I see that guy whom I met during my first onsite trip.The fellow was young and energetic, full of positive thoughts and was an image of a child brimming with energy. He had a passion for life. He enjoyed simple things in life. He was another Indian from a middle class family.
But now I met him a few days back and he was a completely changed man. His face was sunken and swollen. It had lost all its sheen and luster. His thoughts were stark pessimistic, his passion for life had died. He had given into smoking and drinking vigorously. He started drinking and smoking to give company, to be called a "cool" guy and now his mind has taken control over his senses, he cannot understand what harm he is making to himself every coming day. He has completely changed from a fresh and young fellow to dull and dead one. And all this harm happened because he wanted to be in company of the "cool" crowd. So he started smoking and drinking slowly and later on in order to get attention he started smoking and drinking heavily, displaying his image as a natural smoker and drunkard. All this he was doing to be with the "cool" crowd, but now he has reached such a state that even otherwise, he cannot stop smoking every 20 min. He needs to taste alcohol daily. He has taken into drugs, though in low quantity. I can see the demise of a great human being whom I had known 1 year back.
I tried to understand what went wrong and I could find the strongest reason for such a calamity with him was his inability to "introspect", to understand what he wants from life and what he is doing is correct or not. He did not try to understand that drinking and smoking is not the way to make your mark in any crowd, its your thought process, your personality and your acumen which makes you an instant winner (center of attraction) in any crowd.
I can see that a similar fate happens to a lot of people who, from a middle class family wants to taste the big bad word, dying of instant fame and glory and end up living their life in Hell.
It’s a tragedy, which I wish I could undo for my friend.
-ATG
A distant ship’s smoke on the horizon.
You are only coming through in waves.
Your lips move but I can’t hear what you’re sayin’.
When I was a child I had a fever.
My hands felt just like two balloons.
Now I got that feeling once again.
I can’t explain, you would not understand.
This is not how I am.
I have become comfortably numb."
I remember this song whenever I see that guy whom I met during my first onsite trip.The fellow was young and energetic, full of positive thoughts and was an image of a child brimming with energy. He had a passion for life. He enjoyed simple things in life. He was another Indian from a middle class family.
But now I met him a few days back and he was a completely changed man. His face was sunken and swollen. It had lost all its sheen and luster. His thoughts were stark pessimistic, his passion for life had died. He had given into smoking and drinking vigorously. He started drinking and smoking to give company, to be called a "cool" guy and now his mind has taken control over his senses, he cannot understand what harm he is making to himself every coming day. He has completely changed from a fresh and young fellow to dull and dead one. And all this harm happened because he wanted to be in company of the "cool" crowd. So he started smoking and drinking slowly and later on in order to get attention he started smoking and drinking heavily, displaying his image as a natural smoker and drunkard. All this he was doing to be with the "cool" crowd, but now he has reached such a state that even otherwise, he cannot stop smoking every 20 min. He needs to taste alcohol daily. He has taken into drugs, though in low quantity. I can see the demise of a great human being whom I had known 1 year back.
I tried to understand what went wrong and I could find the strongest reason for such a calamity with him was his inability to "introspect", to understand what he wants from life and what he is doing is correct or not. He did not try to understand that drinking and smoking is not the way to make your mark in any crowd, its your thought process, your personality and your acumen which makes you an instant winner (center of attraction) in any crowd.
I can see that a similar fate happens to a lot of people who, from a middle class family wants to taste the big bad word, dying of instant fame and glory and end up living their life in Hell.
It’s a tragedy, which I wish I could undo for my friend.
-ATG
posted by Anil.kumar03@gmail.com at
11:25 PM
2 Comments:
Well written, Anil. And yes, perhaps more than introspection, he needed self-confidence. When you begin to think that you need to sport a cigarette to look cool and stuff, then it is basically inferiority complex, lack of confidence.
And this will serve as a reminder to me and others as well. Thanks for the nice post.
Usually a person get changed himself with the time and sometimes the time change a person.Though most of us will say that your friend changed himself for some reason but the reality is that it's the time which is playing with him and so his health.
It's upto a person's will and mindset that how he will carry himself in the odds.
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